Saturday, May 31, 2008

Late this Saturday morning

Last night, I fell for the hype. I fell for the nostalgia and hype cos me and Boy went to see the Sex and the City movie. Really, cos that's all it is. They spent a fortune in advertisements convincing women that we wanted this and needed this film. Man, It's getting harder and harder to realise the real necessities these days. I mean, if I needed a SATC film, then what word could I possibly use to describe what is "needed" in Darfur, Burma or China? Cos I can't use the word need! It's already being used for something much more important. Ladies, we needed this film.

And why was there so very little sex going on? Did I misread the title? They should have called this Vex in the City instead. E'r'body all mad all the time! Angry bitches! If you had a penis in this film, you were getting no loving. If you were a man who saw this film, I actually felt sorry for you. You were dragged to see this blatant, uncompromising chick flick. But consoled yourself with the idea that you would be seeing tonnes of sex. And you got none. This film was a prick tease.

Now, I did take my husband with me to see this. It felt right to tak him because he is my best friend. Maybe cos he loves me, it did not take very much convincing. I asked only once and got a very amenable affirmative. No arm-twisting, no cajoling, no negotiations... which means that he really wanted to see this shit! Nosey Parker! There were actually more men than I thought there would be, though I think this was because it was late show and there was no-one to see these guys going in with their birds.

Of course I was in the minority, as there were tonnes of groups of women coming from the show before ours and into our show. And they were always in fours -- amazing! Amazing because, firstly, I don't even know three other people! I took my husband. Secondly, they were all dressed up to the nines -- bless. Third, each one of these groups had a member that matched a SATC character. Now it isn't so hard to find a ginger (redhead) over here, so the Miranda role gets easily filled. And the Carrie role gets fought over anyhow; there's a queue of women dying to pretend to be like Carrie. And the role of Samantha the slapper: again, very easy to fill. Shit, just take a look outside any bar on a Saturday night and you'll see a Samantha clone. The girl who tended to fill was always dress inappropriately and was a bit too big to wear what she was wearing. And was very loud. No, by far the hardest role to fill was Charlotte. I've never seen anyone as proper as her over here, ever. If such a woman existed in the Lothians and Borders, she was certainly at a premium last night, filling out SATC foursomes. She was probably double-, or even triple-booked, taking in the 1920 show with some work mates, the 2100 show with the girls from the gym and the 2245 show with her uni pals. Our faux-Charlotte is now probably exhausted and has more engagements tonight, rounding out more quartets.

Now all we need is a Friends feature film and my nostalgia will be complete.

****

Can a dog have a sense of entitlement?

Cos my dog does. For some reason, she has taken to climbing onto our bed. It started off to kinda alert us now upset she was when we rowed. Boy and I used to go awwww and stop immediately. Now it's just all the time: she's hungry or it's Tuesday. Who knows a dog's logic? She also gets highly worked up about her food, all but jumping on us to let us know that she wants her meal. She was never like this before! It's because she knows she can get a reaction from us. So I'm begun to take the bad cop role. I'll ignore or tell her angrily to get off the bed. This morning, she was, again, demanding her food. I ignored her, pleased with my restraint. But then Boy fed her.

2 Comments:

Blogger Zandra Towns said...

I was never in to Sex and the City. Probably because 1)when it started I was in college and did not have cable, 2)I've never lived in New York or any big city, and 3)None of those women looked or acted like me so I could not identify with the show.

Sunday, 1 June 2008 at 16:19:00 BST  
Anonymous Amah said...

Hear, hear!! Isn't my cup of tea either. Works for some, not for me. Sorry.

Tuesday, 3 June 2008 at 23:15:00 BST  

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